[Current O.W.W.L. Journey] I have been feeling trapped
Last weekend we had 14 inches of snow in 2 days. I know this doesn’t compare to the weather back east, but since I live at the bottom of a very steep, long driveway in the mountains, I felt trapped. To make matters worse, the snow plow for the road didn’t arrive until later in the day, even if I could have escaped my driveway. The main problem was that the snow storm came on my only day off when I had fun things to do that had to be rescheduled, including a massage.
Trapped…that’s a word that many of us have used for other circumstances than snow…trapped in a relationship, trapped in a financial situation, trapped in a job, trapped in a body you don’t love, etc. It occurs this way for me when I think I don’t have options or choice. What makes you feel trapped?
I realized that I do have options regarding this snow. I can sell my house and move to town. I can watch the weather report and stay in a motel or with a friend if snow is imminent. I can reschedule my time so that I have a day off during the week when the snow has melted.
So I shifted the experience of feeling trapped to an experience of having the opportunity to be creative and change my context. We surely do need the moisture for our parched forests, after all!
Practicing a perspective of creating freedom,
P. S. If you are feeling trapped and would like freedom instead, you will want to take advantage of a private breakthrough session with me. Please apply here.
[OWWL Success Tip] Your Time is Critical to Creating an Exceptional Life
How you spend your time is critical to creating an exceptional life. Have you dedicated copious amounts of time and attention to your work and your life to maintain high personal standards? Has your passion for excellence driven you to go the extra mile, never stopping, never relenting until you’ve done it right? What happens when we get carried away with perfectionism? We become disgruntled and discouraged, even depressed, when we fail to meet the impossibly high standards we set for ourselves, making us reluctant to take on new challenges or even finish tasks we’ve already started. The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists. It rewards people who get things done.
Are you a control freak? Have you wasted time and emotional energy on things that are beyond your control? This is a recipe for frustration and misery. Some forces are just out of our control. Consuming yourself with the negative aspects of a circumstance is a waste of time. However, if you look at the circumstance productively and positively, coming from the standpoint of “What’s my next best move?” you put yourself back in the driver’s seat.
In his book, The 4-Hour Workweek, Timothy Ferriss says…
“Slow down and remember this: Most things make no difference. Being busy is often a form of mental laziness – lazy thinking and indiscriminate action.”
Busy people are rushing all over the place, and running late half of the time. They are heading to work, conferences, meetings, social engagements, etc. They barely have enough free time for family get togethers and they rarely get enough sleep. Their busy schedule gives them an elevated sense of importance. However, it’s all an illusion. They are like hamsters running on a wheel. Have you been guilty of busyness?
Friends, family, coworkers, colleagues, even acquaintances can eat up your time, especially if they are toxic people. Toxic people drain you. Be smart when it comes to spending your precious time with other people. In creating an exceptional life, start associating with people who are like minded, focused, and supportive. Socialize with people who create energy when they enter the room versus those who create energy when they leave. Reach out to connected, influential individuals who are aligned with your dreams and goals.
Seth Godin wrote an excellent book, Tribes, on finding a tribe and working together to make a difference in all of our lives. We are the sum of the people we spend the most time with. If you hang with the wrong people, they will negatively affect you. However, if you hang with the right people, you will be enriching your exceptional life.
Gale O’Brien is a cancer survivor, motivational speaker and the award-winning author of Transformation: Creating an Exceptional Life in the Face of Cancer now available in both English and Spanish. Transform your life each month with timely tips on food, health, fitness, relationships, and work. Subscribe to the Transformation monthly newsletter or order her book by visiting: www.GaleOBrien.com.
[Current O.W.W.L. Journey] Thank you to my supporters
The past two weeks have been instrumental in getting revitalized after some stressful months. I have been blessed and honored to have many people in my fan club, including my husband, my 2015 Mastery Coach sisters, my Girls’ Night Out ladies, my local and out-of-state friends and colleagues, my mentor coaches, my Facebook friends, my sister, and countless others.
One of the O.W.W.L. Sabotage patterns that will be included in my forthcoming book (sent to the editor last night) is “Separate, Alone, Hard.” I find in my life that “Connection, Partnering, and Support” really make a big difference in having an empowering life.
To whom do you turn for support and help? I’d love to hear from you here.
With support and care,
[O.W.W.L. Success Tip] The Weight of Nurturing…OR…Whose circus ring are you leading
Do you ever have the problem of not enough time or energy to do everything? Do you ever feel like you are the go-to person with all the responsibility? Do you ever think you are the main act by juggling all the balls at a time? The Weight of Nurturing drags us down in more “weighs” than you know.
O.W.W.L. Success Tip: It’s not your circus, and those are not your monkeys! – CLICK TO TWEET
When we expend our energy in too many directions and want some of it back, one great place to examine is whose circus we are trying to ring lead. Is it really yours? Or does the circus and those monkeys belong to someone else? Are you supporting someone who is fully capable of handling it herself? Are you worrying about something over which you have no control? Are you prioritizing others over yourself?
All these examples may be signs that you are not leading your own circus and nurturing your own monkeys. If you find yourself weighed down with nurturing others, it’s time to say, “No.”. Adopt my new mantra, “It’s not my circus, and those aren’t my monkeys” this week.
Please let me know what differences you notice!
Ring leader of Janis’circus,
P.S. I have a few private coaching spots still available. Please share this opportunity with someone who is ready to be the best version of themselves in the areas of Wealth, Weight, or Leadership. They may apply here for a complimentary coaching session.
Success Story:
I wanted to say how much I enjoyed your speaking to SHSMD (Society of Healthcare Strategy and Market Development) earlier this month. Your information (Create an Authentic and Powerful Leading Role) was very insightful. As a board member, we strive to bring in speakers who can challenge and teach us how to grow in our personal and business life. You did that. I wish you continued success and hope our paths cross again.
~ Barbara Stewart, Community Liaison, French Funerals
[O.W.W.L. Success Tip] How’s your “Poop Filter” working?
When I had an argument with my daughter last week, my friend Kathy provided support and shared with me a great distinction called the “Poop Filter.” Thank you, Kath! I loved Kathy’s explanation, and I have embellished it as this week’s Ontological Wealth, Weight, and Leadership Success Tip.
O.W.W.L. Success Tip: Poop filters can help or hinder good communication. (Click to Tweet)
A poop filter results in miscommunication. Imagine a nice clean coffee filter. When you use it to make coffee, the coffee tastes like coffee. But if you were to drag the clean filter through dog poop first, the coffee would taste like dog poop. Kathy reminded me that if my daughter was wearing a poop filter, my conversation in trying to support her would sound/smell like poop to her – NOT the meaning I had intended, but how she interpreted it.
Relationships, especially mothers/daughter relationships, come equipped with poop filters. So if your words are interpreted in a negative way which you did not intend, the other person might be wearing a poop filter. If so, don’t take it personally.
I believe that we can utilize the concept of poop filters for ourselves in a productive way. If you notice you are wearing a poop filter and are reacting negatively to someone’s remarks, remove your filter and replace it with a nice clean one – one without judgment, assumption, or defensiveness.
How do we spot and remove our poop filters? Don’t make any assumptions, be your best version of yourself, and always give people the benefit of the doubt.
Warmly,
P.S. I have a few private coaching spots still available. Please share this opportunity with someone who is ready to be the best version of themselves in the areas of Wealth, Weight, or Leadership. They may apply here for a complimentary coaching session.
Success Story:
Thank you so much for being a part of my life. You have no idea how big of an influence you have played in my life, in turn, a part of my entire part of my family’s life. Thank you!
Maurice Derochers, Ontario, CA
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Lose Weight for Life:
9 Unconscious reasons you can’t keep the weight off and what to do about it
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9 Unconscious reasons you can’t keep the weight off and what to do about it
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